[ of course he notices Jason's arm draping around his waist. how could he not, when it settles there like it belongs there, when Jason's whispered breath comes close and intimate in his ear?
he reminds himself it's just for the case, it's for Casey's eyes tracking their path out of the bar, and there's no point overthinking it. he loops his arm around Jason right back, lifts his gaze to Jason's face and smiles. it's convincing enough from this distance, but Jason will see the displeasure in his eyes. ]
Uh-huh. Grab a bite on the way, find a rooftop to hangout on. [ Jason knows the drill, and they steadily make their way out of the bar on each others arms until they're back on the street. Dick holds onto his thoughts the whole time, as they hop on their bikes and race through the perpetual traffic, through the city, around the city, hot on each others heels going too fast. it loosens the tension held in his shoulders as the wind whips around the helmet and he spares a glance to Jason catching up on his left: ]
[He saw that displeasure and hated it. Hated that it was there and that it was probably at least partially his fault. Dick hadn't wanted him on this job to begin with, he certainly hadn't wanted to entertain the idea of the two of them double teaming Casey. But if he'd said 'no' and Casey had retaliated on Dick, Jason wasn't one hundred percent sure that he would have been able to stop himself from grabbing the derringer from it's holster in the cuff of his boot.
He was better about not killing unless he felt like he had to, but his control wasn't limitless and every instinct under his skin was telling him to take out Casey before the man could get a foothold in his city. He wouldn't, because contrary to what everyone thought, he didn't just arbitrarily murder people.
But he would be keeping a very close eye on him from now on.
The race through the city was a welcome distraction, and by the time Dick pulled up at a stoplight to ask about food, Jason was grinning again.]
Yeah! Turn left at the next and follow the river a bit. Should be on the corner of 17th and West. Food cart.
[ some things never change. he can hear Jasonās excitement through the earpiece. the bike, the lights, the speed takes him back to all the times theyāve done this before. at least this he can count on. ]
Sounds good. [ and he peels off the moment the light turns green and leans so tight into the turn he could skim the pavement with his fingers if he wanted to. he can hear the hum of Jasonās bike behind him and slows down to let Jason take the lead. its not a race, but when is it really not a race?
when they arrive at the food cart, he pulls the helmet off and grins at Jason, pushing his hair back out of his face as the adrenaline continues coursing through his veins. he lets Jason order for the both of them, then carefully cradles their chili dogs down an alleyway, parks their bikes, and climbs up a fire escape to perch over the skyline. Dick leans back and letās his legs dangle over the edge of the rooftop. the clench in his chest loosens up with a breath.
he turns his gaze from the skyline to Jason. they should talk about it. that would be the right thing to do. ]
[The city was it's most beautiful at night. It always had been. Dangerous and foreboding, but sensual and beckoning all at once. The analogy reminded him all at once of Talia and Jason was smirking when he finally brought them to a stop at the chili dog stand.
It would have been more fitting if it was something spicier and exotic, but that might have taken the analogy a little too far.
Following Dick up onto the rooftop, the younger man joined him on the edge, legs lightly bouncing off the wall as he took his first giant bite. He even managed to not get anything onto Dick's shirt.]
Nope, but I don' gotta. I trust you to call it as you see it and if you said it was a no go, that's all I gotta hear.
[ Dick's chili dog sits beside him on the edge of the roof as Jason takes a big bite of his own. he's a little taken aback by what Jason says, fully expecting that there would be pushback to what he had done.
he shakes his head. ]
I don't wanna just call the shots. [ maybe once upon a time, he'd wanted to hoard all the control and information, but it had come from fear, and he doesn't lean into that anymore. he wants Jason to understand and be on board, like a real team. ] I didn't want that to be-- [ none of them had ever been good at putting feelings into words, but he tries anyway. ] the way we got to know each other in that way.
[The difference was, all Jason knew was the 'once upon a time'. He hadn't worked with Nightwing. Hell, he'd barely worked with Dick while they'd shared the Robin costume, Dick running off to join the force as soon as he had.
The last time he'd worked with Dick, Dick had been fighting with Bruce and Bruce had taken it out on him and...not a whole lot of learning had happened. They'd eventually gotten there, but it hadn't exactly been easy. Jason had pretty much just let Dick make the calls so they didn't butt heads about things.
The explanation made him arch a brow, though, a small smirk on his lips as he finished chewing his bite.]
You know, you could have just said that you didn't want to sleep with me. I could have leaned harder on the mark to just pick me over you.
I didn't say I don't wanna sleep with you. [ he retaliates, a pinch between his brow as the admission comes spilling out into the night. not what he wanted to talk about. he continues without skipping a beat: ]
I could've let you handle it completely, but if I wanted it done fast and hard I would've gone in with the mask and without you.
[He was going to take a second bite when that first sentence fell out of Dick's mouth and he abruptly froze, eyes widening as he processed what was just said.
Dick....what?!?
Before he really had a chance to process, however, Dick continued and his disbelief was quickly overridden by mild insult.]
Excuse you, I am perfectly capable of taking point in a honey pot mission without going in 'fast and hard'. I'm a great lay and I'm a master at guiding pillow talk. I once got the GCPD force patrol grid timing of Park Row out of a detective just by playing with his chest hair, so you can take that little assessment and shove it up your ass. And that was without Bat training, so there. [He didn't give in to the urge to stick his tongue out at the older man, but he did finally take that second bite.]
[ itās a hard fact to hear, and it only sets Dickās frown deeper as Jason tosses it in his face. doing honeypot missions as a kid is part of Jasonās history, the part that makes him ache the most. the frustration fizzles out and is replaced by guilt.
for asking Jason to do this, for implying he couldnāt do it well. ]
Fine. [ he finally picks up the chilli dog and takes a bite. doesnāt help with the fact that heās now imagining how great of a lay Jason would be, and how good at guiding pillow talk he is. ] Youāre right, Iām sorry. [ he looks out at the city and continues without as much bite in his words. ] Youād sleep with him, and I donāt like the idea of that. Iād be pushing you too far.
[He'd meant to lighten the mood, not make Dick look like he'd sucked on a lemon. Yeah, it was mildly insulting to think that he couldn't be a decent honey pot for whatever reason, but he wasn't actually upset by it. But watching Dick shut down like that was...concerning.
Shifting to sit crosslegged, half sideways on the ledge, he reached out to nudge the older man with his boot.]
You are being way too serious about this, Dickiebird. What is going on in that head of yours?
[ great. now there are two of them being way too serious about this, meaning it's his turn to pull back and lighten things up. he huffs a half-laugh and shakes his head, trying to brush it off.
Jason doesn't expect a real answer on that one. he can't truthfully say it all. how could he? ]
We haven't worked together in a while, that's all. I'm disappointed it didn't go according to plan but--it's fine. It didn't go badly. [ Casey has his number and is obviously still interested, so he just has to continue later... without Jason. ] Seriously. [ he knocks his chin up and smiles, though the warmth doesn't quite touch his eyes. ]
Hey, you should start buying your shirts smaller like that. [ a wider smile. ] Looks good on you. Did you hear what Casey called you?
[And it would have worked....except that Jason had witnessed the fights between Dick and Bruce. He'd been there and got to see all of that go down and then, after all the dust settled, he got to see Dick come over to him. And try to act like he wasn't upset to try and make sure that Jason wasn't upset.
And that tone was surprisingly similar to what he was hearing now.
He arched a brow, the chili dog cradled in his hand, mostly forgotten.]
Stop trying to manage me, Dickface. Whatever it is, just spit it out.
[ Jason doesn't relent, and Dick thinks it says something about growth that he digs his heels in and chooses whatever Dick is holding onto over the chili dog. he should be flattered if he wasn't so torn.
torn between continuing to play it off, or finding a way to express himself. but the beat drags on for too long as he takes in the expression on Jason's face, and his own smile tapers to something more acceptant.
fine. ]
I'm starting to see I can't do a mission like this when you're involved. [ he folds a leg on the ledge and turns to face Jason. Jason, who's wearing that dumb shirt, carefully holding his chili dog and completely tuned in, watching him, hearing him. ] I'm not saying it's your fault--it's just fucking with me, and I'm gonna sort it out.
[Of all the things he'd expected to hear, that wasn't one of them. He cocked his head a little in confusion, but he didn't immediately open his mouth to expel exactly how much those words hurt and, honestly, he should get a medal for that.
Hadn't Dickie just said that sex with him wasn't what was bothering him? Or had that been an outright lie?]
Is it the 'brothers' thing? Cause, you know....we're not actually related. We haven't even spent that much time together.
But fine, I guess. I'll back off from trying to help. Just...find someone to be on the other side of that comm, man. I don't like the look of that guy.
[ heās not articulating it well, and itās making Jason completely misunderstand his point, but for a brief moment, he wonders if itās better to let Jason believe what he wants to assume.
but itās gotta be frustrating hearing him talk about it like this, like he canāt just say it. ]
Okay. I will. [ itās better that itās someone else on the other end of the comm, Jasonās right, but it doesnāt feel right to let Jason operate under this assumption.
so after a quiet beat of consideration, he just says it. plain and simple. ]
I canāt risk falling for you. Sex is just sex, but I know itās not gonna be like that with you.
[He can't understand what isn't being said, Grayson. He's good, but he's not that good. Being blunt and not mincing words is the best way to get your point across, especially to someone who was, admittedly, a little thick at times.
He was thinking that Dick was uncomfortable with him being on the case because of the brother thing, not because sex with him would get complicated. He blinked when the truth came out, but he didn't look immediately off put by the idea.]
Huh. I guess that makes sense. I mean, it would mean something to me, so I can see it.
[He was far too comfortable just admitting that, but there you go. Sometimes removing the filter was the best option.
He took another bite of his chili dog, chewing thoughtfully before he smirked and chuckled]
Good thing you're not trying to impress me. Chili dogs as a first date would not get you to any bases. Just saying.
[ it goes over much better than Dick imagines. Jason simply accepts it and continues eating his chili dog. it doesnāt get weird at all. he ends up smiling about that more than Jasonās actual joke. ]
Really? [ he laughs as he turns back to his own food. ] āCus this is pretty good for me. [ rooftop, casual food, a beautiful view and even more beautiful company. whatās not to love? more than anything, Dick is just glad Jason understands what heās been trying to say. some days, he feels he tries so hard to predict Jasonās reaction that he ends up not doing anything at all. ]
Good thing this isnāt a date. [ he takes a bite of the chili dog and folds his leg back over the ledge. ]
Edited (Iā¦ hit enter too quicklyā¦ ) 2023-11-17 04:03 (UTC)
[Maybe it's time to stop trying to predict Jason's reactions. He is, after all, still only human. The Pit Madness is still very real, but he'd spent a lot of time and effort learning how to control it. How to not let it control him.
It took work and willpower- and maybe a little bit of therapy that he hadn't exactly told Dick about, yet- but he was far more relaxed than he had been the last time Dick had seen him. The whole 'eight heads in a duffle bag' situation and all.
As for how relaxed he was about the topic...well, his mindset was actually very close to Dick's on that. Sex was just a tool in his tool belt. It had always been that way.]
No, it's a great date. But not a first date, Dickie. Come on, sometimes a guy likes to know he's special. Add a blanket and some pillows and maybe some pretend stargazing and I'm sold, though. 10 outta 10, would kiss you goodnight.
[ he really shouldnāt be as easily charmed by Jasonās antics as he is, but here he is, smiling around his last mouthful of the chili dog. he crumples its thin sleeve in his hand and wipes off his fingers on a napkin. ]
Cute, Jason. Didnāt know you were about that. [ thereās a warm mirth in his eyes as he sets a hand on the ledge beside him and looks at Jason. but despite what he says, heās always known Jason was a romantic. his soft heart felt so much, and as crushed and hardened as it was by the world, it still showed through in moments like this. he wants so badly to protect it.
doesnāt mean he wonāt tease. ]
You sure you wouldnāt want a long walk on the beach? [ his smile widens. ] Or Iāll pack you a picnic with cheeses and a baguette and all that. Maybe a bottle of wine? Or is that too much for a first date?
[He rolled his eyes, but he was still grinning as he popped the last of his chili dog into his mouth. The paper slip got folded and slipped into the pocket of his jeans and then he was flopping back to lay out on the ledge as he finished chewing, his arms folding up to pillow his head.
Dick's far too small shirt rode up far too much with the motion.]
I don't know about the beach, but a picnic sounds nice. No wine, never got a taste for the stuff, but bread and cheese sound good. Maybe pack a new book. Settle in under a shade tree and just take turns reading to each other.
[He wasn't being wistful. No, that would be silly.
Clearing his throat, he let one leg dangle out over the edge.]
Nobody does shit like that anymore, dude. It's all gone the way of handwritten love letters and heartfelt conversations. Today's world is too broken for it. Besides, you'd crawl outta your skin in a situation like that.
[ he'll just casually ignore the urge to drag his hand along Jason's newly revealed mid drift, and instead, just tip his head questioningly with a teasing smirk. ]
Says who? If I can read a story to a room full of toddlers, I can read to you, Jason.
[He grinned up at the sky, shaking his head a little. He didn't believe that for a second, but also...the mental image of Dick Grayson surrounded by toddlers with a book and that perfect fucking smile...
It did things to his stomach that he didn't give it permission to do.]
Whatever you say, Dickiebird. [And if his voice was far too fond and far too soft to have ever come from Jason Todd, well there was no one there to hear it.]
[ his own smile softens with that tone. he knows how rare it is, how rare these moments are in general, when theyāre more or less getting along, having a conversation, getting to catch a break. ]
Youāre invited if you wanna come, but theyāre not reading Tolkien yet. Next oneās how the Grinch Stole Christmas. Maybe itāll resonate with you.
[He smirked, lightly kicking out with his dangling leg to tap Dick's with the toe of his boot. No rough housing this close to the edge, but he didn't think that counted.]
I'm actually pretty good with kids. I volunteer in a lot of my shelters if they're running low on staff and I don't have any time sensitive cases.
[ Dick pulls his leg away, lifting a brow in warning as a smirk tugs at his mouth. down, boy. Jason doesnāt protest the Grinch part. ]
Yeah, I know youād be. [ good with kids, that is. Jason has the personality for it. he sees it in glimpses sometimes, when the curtains are drawn and the threats fall away. thereās something about kids that disarms both of them. at least they have that in common. ]
Iād still like to see it, though. Come by sometime. [ to the Library near the Titans tower. ] Then weāll grab a coffee and Iāll show you āround town. Howās that for a first date?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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he reminds himself it's just for the case, it's for Casey's eyes tracking their path out of the bar, and there's no point overthinking it. he loops his arm around Jason right back, lifts his gaze to Jason's face and smiles. it's convincing enough from this distance, but Jason will see the displeasure in his eyes. ]
Uh-huh. Grab a bite on the way, find a rooftop to hangout on. [ Jason knows the drill, and they steadily make their way out of the bar on each others arms until they're back on the street. Dick holds onto his thoughts the whole time, as they hop on their bikes and race through the perpetual traffic, through the city, around the city, hot on each others heels going too fast. it loosens the tension held in his shoulders as the wind whips around the helmet and he spares a glance to Jason catching up on his left: ]
Any new fave chili dog spots?
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He was better about not killing unless he felt like he had to, but his control wasn't limitless and every instinct under his skin was telling him to take out Casey before the man could get a foothold in his city. He wouldn't, because contrary to what everyone thought, he didn't just arbitrarily murder people.
But he would be keeping a very close eye on him from now on.
The race through the city was a welcome distraction, and by the time Dick pulled up at a stoplight to ask about food, Jason was grinning again.]
Yeah! Turn left at the next and follow the river a bit. Should be on the corner of 17th and West. Food cart.
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Sounds good. [ and he peels off the moment the light turns green and leans so tight into the turn he could skim the pavement with his fingers if he wanted to. he can hear the hum of Jasonās bike behind him and slows down to let Jason take the lead. its not a race, but when is it really not a race?
when they arrive at the food cart, he pulls the helmet off and grins at Jason, pushing his hair back out of his face as the adrenaline continues coursing through his veins. he lets Jason order for the both of them, then carefully cradles their chili dogs down an alleyway, parks their bikes, and climbs up a fire escape to perch over the skyline. Dick leans back and letās his legs dangle over the edge of the rooftop. the clench in his chest loosens up with a breath.
he turns his gaze from the skyline to Jason. they should talk about it. that would be the right thing to do. ]
You get why I called it off, right?
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It would have been more fitting if it was something spicier and exotic, but that might have taken the analogy a little too far.
Following Dick up onto the rooftop, the younger man joined him on the edge, legs lightly bouncing off the wall as he took his first giant bite. He even managed to not get anything onto Dick's shirt.]
Nope, but I don' gotta. I trust you to call it as you see it and if you said it was a no go, that's all I gotta hear.
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he shakes his head. ]
I don't wanna just call the shots. [ maybe once upon a time, he'd wanted to hoard all the control and information, but it had come from fear, and he doesn't lean into that anymore. he wants Jason to understand and be on board, like a real team. ] I didn't want that to be-- [ none of them had ever been good at putting feelings into words, but he tries anyway. ] the way we got to know each other in that way.
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The last time he'd worked with Dick, Dick had been fighting with Bruce and Bruce had taken it out on him and...not a whole lot of learning had happened. They'd eventually gotten there, but it hadn't exactly been easy. Jason had pretty much just let Dick make the calls so they didn't butt heads about things.
The explanation made him arch a brow, though, a small smirk on his lips as he finished chewing his bite.]
You know, you could have just said that you didn't want to sleep with me. I could have leaned harder on the mark to just pick me over you.
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I could've let you handle it completely, but if I wanted it done fast and hard I would've gone in with the mask and without you.
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Dick....what?!?
Before he really had a chance to process, however, Dick continued and his disbelief was quickly overridden by mild insult.]
Excuse you, I am perfectly capable of taking point in a honey pot mission without going in 'fast and hard'. I'm a great lay and I'm a master at guiding pillow talk. I once got the GCPD force patrol grid timing of Park Row out of a detective just by playing with his chest hair, so you can take that little assessment and shove it up your ass. And that was without Bat training, so there. [He didn't give in to the urge to stick his tongue out at the older man, but he did finally take that second bite.]
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for asking Jason to do this, for implying he couldnāt do it well. ]
Fine. [ he finally picks up the chilli dog and takes a bite. doesnāt help with the fact that heās now imagining how great of a lay Jason would be, and how good at guiding pillow talk he is. ] Youāre right, Iām sorry. [ he looks out at the city and continues without as much bite in his words. ] Youād sleep with him, and I donāt like the idea of that. Iād be pushing you too far.
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Shifting to sit crosslegged, half sideways on the ledge, he reached out to nudge the older man with his boot.]
You are being way too serious about this, Dickiebird. What is going on in that head of yours?
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Jason doesn't expect a real answer on that one. he can't truthfully say it all. how could he? ]
We haven't worked together in a while, that's all. I'm disappointed it didn't go according to plan but--it's fine. It didn't go badly. [ Casey has his number and is obviously still interested, so he just has to continue later... without Jason. ] Seriously. [ he knocks his chin up and smiles, though the warmth doesn't quite touch his eyes. ]
Hey, you should start buying your shirts smaller like that. [ a wider smile. ] Looks good on you. Did you hear what Casey called you?
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And that tone was surprisingly similar to what he was hearing now.
He arched a brow, the chili dog cradled in his hand, mostly forgotten.]
Stop trying to manage me, Dickface. Whatever it is, just spit it out.
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torn between continuing to play it off, or finding a way to express himself. but the beat drags on for too long as he takes in the expression on Jason's face, and his own smile tapers to something more acceptant.
fine. ]
I'm starting to see I can't do a mission like this when you're involved. [ he folds a leg on the ledge and turns to face Jason. Jason, who's wearing that dumb shirt, carefully holding his chili dog and completely tuned in, watching him, hearing him. ] I'm not saying it's your fault--it's just fucking with me, and I'm gonna sort it out.
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Hadn't Dickie just said that sex with him wasn't what was bothering him? Or had that been an outright lie?]
Is it the 'brothers' thing? Cause, you know....we're not actually related. We haven't even spent that much time together.
But fine, I guess. I'll back off from trying to help. Just...find someone to be on the other side of that comm, man. I don't like the look of that guy.
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but itās gotta be frustrating hearing him talk about it like this, like he canāt just say it. ]
Okay. I will. [ itās better that itās someone else on the other end of the comm, Jasonās right, but it doesnāt feel right to let Jason operate under this assumption.
so after a quiet beat of consideration, he just says it. plain and simple. ]
I canāt risk falling for you. Sex is just sex, but I know itās not gonna be like that with you.
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He was thinking that Dick was uncomfortable with him being on the case because of the brother thing, not because sex with him would get complicated. He blinked when the truth came out, but he didn't look immediately off put by the idea.]
Huh. I guess that makes sense. I mean, it would mean something to me, so I can see it.
[He was far too comfortable just admitting that, but there you go. Sometimes removing the filter was the best option.
He took another bite of his chili dog, chewing thoughtfully before he smirked and chuckled]
Good thing you're not trying to impress me. Chili dogs as a first date would not get you to any bases. Just saying.
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Really? [ he laughs as he turns back to his own food. ] āCus this is pretty good for me. [ rooftop, casual food, a beautiful view and even more beautiful company. whatās not to love? more than anything, Dick is just glad Jason understands what heās been trying to say. some days, he feels he tries so hard to predict Jasonās reaction that he ends up not doing anything at all. ]
Good thing this isnāt a date. [ he takes a bite of the chili dog and folds his leg back over the ledge. ]
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It took work and willpower- and maybe a little bit of therapy that he hadn't exactly told Dick about, yet- but he was far more relaxed than he had been the last time Dick had seen him. The whole 'eight heads in a duffle bag' situation and all.
As for how relaxed he was about the topic...well, his mindset was actually very close to Dick's on that. Sex was just a tool in his tool belt. It had always been that way.]
No, it's a great date. But not a first date, Dickie. Come on, sometimes a guy likes to know he's special. Add a blanket and some pillows and maybe some pretend stargazing and I'm sold, though. 10 outta 10, would kiss you goodnight.
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Cute, Jason. Didnāt know you were about that. [ thereās a warm mirth in his eyes as he sets a hand on the ledge beside him and looks at Jason. but despite what he says, heās always known Jason was a romantic. his soft heart felt so much, and as crushed and hardened as it was by the world, it still showed through in moments like this. he wants so badly to protect it.
doesnāt mean he wonāt tease. ]
You sure you wouldnāt want a long walk on the beach? [ his smile widens. ] Or Iāll pack you a picnic with cheeses and a baguette and all that. Maybe a bottle of wine? Or is that too much for a first date?
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Dick's far too small shirt rode up far too much with the motion.]
I don't know about the beach, but a picnic sounds nice. No wine, never got a taste for the stuff, but bread and cheese sound good. Maybe pack a new book. Settle in under a shade tree and just take turns reading to each other.
[He wasn't being wistful. No, that would be silly.
Clearing his throat, he let one leg dangle out over the edge.]
Nobody does shit like that anymore, dude. It's all gone the way of handwritten love letters and heartfelt conversations. Today's world is too broken for it. Besides, you'd crawl outta your skin in a situation like that.
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Says who? If I can read a story to a room full of toddlers, I can read to you, Jason.
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It did things to his stomach that he didn't give it permission to do.]
Whatever you say, Dickiebird. [And if his voice was far too fond and far too soft to have ever come from Jason Todd, well there was no one there to hear it.]
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Youāre invited if you wanna come, but theyāre not reading Tolkien yet. Next oneās how the Grinch Stole Christmas. Maybe itāll resonate with you.
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[He smirked, lightly kicking out with his dangling leg to tap Dick's with the toe of his boot. No rough housing this close to the edge, but he didn't think that counted.]
I'm actually pretty good with kids. I volunteer in a lot of my shelters if they're running low on staff and I don't have any time sensitive cases.
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Yeah, I know youād be. [ good with kids, that is. Jason has the personality for it. he sees it in glimpses sometimes, when the curtains are drawn and the threats fall away. thereās something about kids that disarms both of them. at least they have that in common. ]
Iād still like to see it, though. Come by sometime. [ to the Library near the Titans tower. ] Then weāll grab a coffee and Iāll show you āround town. Howās that for a first date?
(no subject)